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Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Reset My Brain


21th May 2012

Dear Cassi,

One of the funny thoughts that ran through my head today was that there was a time when people thought that cold could reset the human brain. This was something done to the mentally ill when they could not be controlled. I believe the practice is Russian, but don’t hold me to that as fact.
       
I’m told that what one did was have a tub full of ice that the patient or victim could be zipped into forcing them to feel the intense cold. This was supposed to work like pulling the plug on your computer when it is miss behaving.
       
This came to mind because of my own malfunctioning brain that the fact the heat has always been my off switch. On the hottest days I can do nothing but sit with the fan drying my perspiration.
       
Today, however, I couldn’t tell you why I’ve felt so useless, but my body just felt like it was fevered. What time I didn’t spend in bed I spent in front of the computer goofing off. With the overwhelming workload that still looms ahead of me I need to focus.
       
I’m doing better, true, but the bits of my home only peak out from the trash and misused equipment. There are times that I sit with the fans passing air over me hoping that the cold I feel from them will reset my brain. It never happens that way but you know what happens if you hope in one hand.


Live every day, little sister



Richard Leland Neal