15th
May 2012
Dear Cassi,
In that nature
of my car problems I found an anger that wanted destruction. With this I turned
to the boxes of paper records that have long plagued me and that have sat for as
long as fifteen years. I turned to the paper shredder to disposed of this and
found satisfaction in watching the pages turn to confetti in the teeth of the
black and cream beast.
Some hours into
my labor the shredder could take no more and jammed to tell me it was done
working for the day. I turned to fire seeing that I was not a tenth of the way
completed in my task.
I found a
greater satisfaction in the burning embers of my mistakes in life and kept at
this with three full boxes of paper that the fire choked on as hit burnt a
history of no importance. Smoke stung in my eyes but somehow I loved the
destruction of that old nature and new that with the smoke clear I could look
ahead.
It was during
this labor that I was called on by Falstaff’s father who was to go with me to
have my car looked at and he was stunned by this action thinking in the fire
there was some anger from me to his son for the damage to my vehicle.
I was angry and
I found something productive to do with that anger. If all the anger we feel
could be put to good use would this not be a better world?
Always find
your light, little sister
Richard Leland
Neal
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