Dear Doctor Beals

3^rd  May 2013

Dear Doctor Beals,

A subject has crossed my desk that would benefit from your expertise in intimate relationships. It’s more of an argument really but none the less I feel it is in the greater interest of the persons involved and their future significant others that I do my best to resolve the dispute.

It would happen that a heterosexual male wished to add a second female to his sexual activity with his girlfriend and later wife. The woman in question has a history of sexual trauma. It is my understanding that her sexual behaviors are strong and strange enough to warrant the question. Further, what a group of consenting adults does with their bodies is their business and it is my practice never to judge people on their sexual choices.

However, when the female refused the male became insistent. He masturbated to pornography featuring to females and insisted on watching this pornography during intercourse. He further became increasingly upset when the female continued to refuse. At one time he went so far as to withhold sex unless his significant other agreed to permit a second female in the relationship.

After the couple was married he only raised the subject once and was silenced by strong reproach. There was little sex in the relationship after marriage and what there was involved watching pornography.

Now, it is my opinion that pressuring your significant other into a sexual situation in which they are uncomfortable is a breach of trust. Further, it is my opinion that intercourse should be an act of mutual fulfillment.

Would this man’s actions be a breach of trust?   

Richard Leland Neal