In 2016

16th September 2024

Okay, Boss,

You’re looking for a man in my age range who has an opinion on “2016”. I’m going to guess you mean the election here, but your instructions are to make a statement of one to two hundred words off the cuff without doing research. Well, here goes.

In 2016 the American people were given a choice between an entrenched politician and a wildcard who had conflicting methodologies. Clinton, the entrenched politician, preached a realistic attitude that foretold the fall of the coal industry and made no falsehoods about the change that was in the future of the country. Trump, wild card, preached a return to the golden age of America telling coal workers that he would protect their jobs. Faced with a dismal truth or a hopeful lie enough people accepted the lie as their best hope placing Donald Trump in power. Other factors tipped the needle in Trump’s direction like poorly timed investigation announcements and Russian interference. The Clinton camp thought it was a no contest win and got complacent. Any one of these could have been the tipping point for the election, but it is widely considered a wind gust victory for Trump.

That’s what comes off the top of my head anyway. I mean, I’ve looked at what happened a few times and have strong opinions of it, but that’s what I can sum it up as on the fly.

Best,



Richard Leland Neal

Hoping Kind of People

26th October 2023

Okay boss,

You need a writer and I’m one of those ‘hoping this is my big chance’ kinds of people with little experience, but all the drive in the world. I mostly have written comedy scripts. Comedy news for a YouTube channel to be clear. You can find that on my IMDB.

I wrote two full length plays and one full length film in college but after finding little in the ways of advice for marketing these works I got a degree in Psychology. I tend to lean into the darker parts of the human mind, and I like to really get out there and bend some brains.

I’ve written a few other scripts, I know I wrote a romantic comedy somewhere and a Sci-Fi thriller. I wrote the Thriller with a co-author and he wasn’t very compromising.

Where I’m at as a writer is green to the professional world, seasoned to working with others, and running out of time to get this going. If you have a job for me that job will be a big deal. If I had an agent I wouldn’t be answering this ad. If you need an agent, yeah, I can’t help you.

I think I get an answer for every hundred or so of these I sent out so I’ll be happy to hear from you.

Best,



Richard

In House Work

17th August 2024

Dear Movie People,

If I read your ad correctly you’re looking for a writer to come and do some in house work in Culver City. That’s a drive for me but manageable. It would more depend on how long you need me there and how many days a week. Do you have a finished script or just an idea? That sort of thing will be important.

Back in my college days I took a writing class at the CSU. The professor said he would send my work to a production company, and like a fool I believed him. Hollywood, am I right? Anyway, I turned in my first draft in three weeks. I had started from scratch when he told me that a horror movie was easy to get made.

After that we would have half hour meetings where he would give me notes. I’d have the next draft on his desk by morning. I’d wait a week or two for him to give me more notes then have the next draft on his desk the next morning. By the time finals rolled around I had an A in the class and would have already had a B in his second class “Rewriting the Screenplay” but he never sent anyone’s work to a production company.

I’ve had a few short films produced and I did comedy news for a YouTube channel but the director is still dragging his tail on giving me IMDB credit for all my work. I think we made something like three hundred videos together, but I got credit for twelve.

Most of my writing training is in live theater so I have a strong grasp of dialogue. My degree is in Psychology because writing is about human emotion and I wanted a strong understanding of it. In college I once took a theater class and a Psychology class in the same semester and for most of the time both covered the same topics.

As for your statement about not being someone looking for a quick paycheck, well, I’m looking to make a mark. This job would hopefully be the key to the next job, and I’d hope that if asked you’d speak well of me. They say that every work of art is a portrait of the artist.

How will we paint ourselves?


Richard Leland Neal

Construction Site in Hollywood

25th April 2023

Gentle Persons,

Your ad states that you’re looking for security for a construction site in Hollywood. I’m a guard with more than twenty years experience who has reliable transportation. I’ve worked a few construction sites in the past and know the ins and outs of that kind of work.

I have just taken a part time job which is on call and few hours a week so I need do no more than call them and inform them of a change in my availability. I have no hours scheduled past the twenty eighth, but I would like to give them as much notice as possible.

The jobs they have me on I’m sitting in my car using a portable toilet which is much like construction. Normally on a construction site I have a folding table and chair that I use. I tend to work the night shift and it’s best to be out in the elements to keep eyes and ears on the site.

Past that, well, I’m a man with bills to pay and I’d never take a day off until I get them paid if I could. You want to hire a man with bills to pay, because such a man comes to work every day no matter what.

I can tell you that during the pandemic I came down with a case of pneumonia. I didn’t miss a day of work. I already had to have a mask on and taking time off would mean losing overtime so I worked six days with the illness taking my patrols and filling out my reports.

If you’re looking for dependable I’m your man.

Best,


Richard Leland Neal

Collaborators

24th October 2023

Hay there YouTube People,

I’m an insane fat man trying to save the world. I linked my success to planting trees and cleaning the ocean so your request for collaborators may do some good for the world. I mention this often in my YouTube videos. However, this is of little interest to you.

My main thing is movie reviews on the YouTube channel ‘Random Street Theater’ and food reviews on my Blog ‘Richard Reviews Everything’. I had a stint as a comedy news writer and voice actor on Absurd TV. I have done comedy impersonations of Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and Rudy Giuliani. I also voice for Absurd TV two Russians, QAnon, two mice technicians, a Zoologist foot, the announcer, and an alien.

Example:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m69RUhM2EGE

I stopped working with Absurd TV when they moved on to other content. I was working for free anyway, and the few hundred videos I wrote and performed in were never promoted so I got very little feedback.

As an actor, I have been compared to John Candy, Chris Farley, and Peter Griffin. I’ve been in a few short films and stage plays. I work the night shift so I normally can get to shoots during the day.

What I brought to the table with Absurd TV was a business minded drive to make the best videos at the lowest price. I like to make good use of what we have, and I was always trying to be sure the editor had something to work on because you never knew when he was going to have time to work.

I dropped their cost by ninety five percent and increased video output from twelve videos a year to well over two hundred. Now, they do shorts which they just don’t need me for. I did write shorts for them, but it just isn’t going to get monetized at the numbers they pull and so what’s the point?

Best,



Richard



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